Dorg porn
January 19th, 2010
Somebody just found this site by googling “dorg porn”
Somebody has some SERIOUS explaining to do.
Archive
Archive for the ‘Thoughts’ Category
SONIC BOOM
September 9th, 2009
Well, I’m pretty sure Rob is officially gone, and I don’t remember when he said he’s coming back. If people tell me important information while I’m drunk, I have a strange bad habit of completely forgetting it. Anyways, he mentioned something about Las Vegas and Disneyland, and I hope for his sake that he didn’t originally intend on driving to any of those places. Also, I wonder if there’s any costumed jerks of Marvel superheroes in Disneyland yet.
That being said, I suppose it’s about time to attempt to construct some half-decent content for the site.
Last Saturday, I dragged my lazy ass out of bed at 6:00 am 6:45 am, jumped in my car, picked up a friend of mine, and drove three hours north to a little place called Edmonton to attend a little event called the Sonic Boom Modern Music Festival. Unlike our good friend Rob, who happens to score free passes to all sorts of festivals, I had to pay for my ticket. I suppose the main reason I didn’t get awesome free swag or press passes or anything is my own fault. I just didn’t ask for them.
Because of this, I decided against writing a review for a show that I paid money for. I will however, share with you some irrelevant observations I made during the show.
- While waiting in line to buy water, (the alleged “free water refill” stations were nowhere to be found.) my friend whispered in my ear, pointing out that the guy in front of us had a tampon sticking out of his back pocket. My friend was trying to be subtle about it, but I burst out laughing, and belligerently shouting about the tampon. He and his girlfriend, clearly embarrassed, quickly walked away, leaving two less people in line in front of us.
- During Metric’s time onstage, a group of oil rig workers, possibly high on coke, started a mosh pit. Not only are most of their songs a little on the soft side for moshing, the majority of their fan base are teenage girls. Despite pleas to stop, the sweaty arrogant shirtless assholes would not stop hurling themselves against the crowd of said teenage girls.
- Franz Ferdinand should have reconsidered singing This Fire. Considering Edmonton’s past, they might actually burn this city.
- Mullets are still awesome.
That’s about all I wanted to share on that. Franz Ferdinand and Metric were spectacular, and I really liked USS, who played earlier in the day. Spamming the SONIC BOOM sound byte from Street Fighter II over and over was brilliant. We left before Alexisonfire and Billy Talent started to play, not only because of the long drive back, but also because I don’t think anybody old enough to drink actually cares about either of them.
One last note, I created an email, if anyone wants to send some love mail, hate mail, or spam.
Mars Attacks
August 18th, 2009
Out of all the movies out there about invading alien forces, barely any of them show the conflict from the alien’s point of view, and those that do seem a just little bit biased. We never get a good, relatable reason behind the decision to eradicate mankind. Here’s how I picture that conversation going:
Alien 1: “Research team, what have you observed about these humans?”
Alien 2: “The average human enjoys nothing more than to put his or her mouth around a complete stranger’s genitals. But they sanitize their hands after uster using the elevator.”
Alien 1: “Destroy them.”
Cat’s Eye
July 28th, 2009
The cat got an eye infection, so we had to put one of those lampshade-looking things around her neck to stop her from scratching at it. I felt kind of bad that I was getting such a kick out of watching her running around bumping into things, but it really is funny watching the look of confusion on her face while she tries to figure out why she can’t fit under the kitchen chairs any more.
It was funny right up until the moment she threw up. Barf is gross. A cat barfing through a funnel strapped to its head is horrifying.
Advertisers – Please Read!
July 9th, 2009
One of the companies currently advertising on my site is a professional gaming studio who are advertising their new episodic Monkey Island games. It’s pretty damn cool for me, but it also creates a bit of a conflict of interest if I want to review it sometime in the future. On the other hand, ignoring it would compromise my artistic integrity. I’ve realized that this will probably happen more and more as my site grows, so I’d like to take a minute to address my artistic intergrity:
I have none. Please send me free things.
Thanks,
Rob
